...catching a glimpse of a beautiful sunset
...listening to my son giggle (yes, he still giggles)
...talking with an old friend
This week I have had some pretty incredible things happen.On Monday I was able to chat with a mom in the nursery at church. A fairly ordinary conversation that generated a ton of "hope." And hope...makes my heart dance more than anything!
That same night, I discovered that a family of four children from a recovery group live right around the corner from me. Cutest kids in the world. Last night as I was pulling around the corner to my house I noticed they were outside playing. I slowly drove past them, waved and continued on. I no sooner step out of my car and there was the second oldest boy, standing behind my car on his scooter with this huge grin as if to welcome me home. He hugged me and we chatted for a bit. Within moments of being inside the house I looked out the window to see three of the four standing out front, so I immediately rushed out to love on the others.
A few months ago, a co-worker of mine and his girlfriend were expecting the birth of their first child. I was excited for them and it was amazing to see and hear the excitement as they prepared for her arrival.
After being absent from work for a few days and not hearing from him, my joy of anticipating the news turned to fear that something was wrong. Finally, three days later a phone call came in. But rather than the tone of happiness coming from a first time father, I heard something else and it was more than mere exhaustion.
Delora Sunshine is what they named her and he gave me a summary of her weight and length, minor details of the labor and then as his voice began to crack, he shared the news of her being born with Down Syndrome. I sat on the phone with him for at least a half an hour as he worked through his emotions.
Throughout the pregnancy there was no indication that there was anything wrong with the baby. So now along with the newness of parenting, they instantly had to adjust to being the parents of a child with special needs.
He has an amazing heart and is a very wise individual. Immediately I knew, that if anyone could cope with this...it would be the two of them.
How can something so sad make my heart dance? Read on...
During the phone conversation with my co-worker, he had shared the first 24 hours of their journey with me. They questioned whether or not they were going to keep her or give her up for adoption. In his next breath he said, "But how messed up would that be?" He continued and said, "She chose us." Now at this point in time, I thought, 'Ok...you're getting close but I'm not yet going to bring up the fact that I believe God chose her for you.' The conversation continued and this was it: He said, "We've spoken to our midwives and they have encouraged us to get involved with a support group." (...I think I know where this is going...) "And that means we are more than likely going to need to find a church." Ta-da!!! Absolutely!!!
My heart danced.
In the weeks to follow, I was blessed to have the opportunity to view a slide show of pictures from Delora's birth. I say blessed, but there was a lot of unsettled emotion as I watched it. I can't imagine being in their shoes. Yet even though I can't imagine it...I am a firm believer that our God does not give us more than we can handle. And in the past few months I have witnessed two
non-believers step...rather leap into this whole new life with such strength and courage. And there is no greater proof that the Almighty exists than to see Him work in the life of someone like this. My heart dances!
So yesterday as I was catching up with my co-worker, he was telling me about the "demand" of Down Syndrome adoptions (sounds a little funny, I know), especially among Christians. He said that most of them believe that God brings them into the world for a reason (as opposed to the critical belief that they are born because of improper care during pregnancy). And that while some people don't feel they can handle raising a child with special needs, He places them in families that can. He mentioned that he's been told that God gave Delora to them for a purpose.
...Yes, he sure did! My heart began to do a little jig!
It was then that I mentioned how I feel in regards to my own spiritual growth. When I was pregnant with Nick it was out of wedlock and I could have easily been (and I'm sure I was) "looked down" upon by a lot of people. But even through my sin in this situation I have seen such a positive purpose for my circumstance. And I am blessed beyond measure.
To end our conversation, my co-worker looked at me and said, "Don't beat yourself up over it too much. Marisa and I had Delora out of wedlock too." I laughed hysterically...and as I walked out the door of my office to head home, my heart danced because he seems one step closer to allowing his heart to dance as well.
The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song. -Psalm 28:7
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